I find it interesting that both of you, Lana, and Gwendolyn, had this epiphany while far from home. Is it because there was a dearth of people you could connect with where you live, or was it because you’re in a new environment and somewhat force/ encouraged to interact with people that you might not normally meet? I suspect the latter.
It could be some of both, though more the latter. I think when you come into a focused environment around a topic or common interest, you become close more quickly because you are in a shared headspace. I found that to be the case at the Don't Die, MEA and this recent CCL Leadership at the Peak gatherings.
I am also an only child who is content to be alone. But I attended a MEA retreat on women's health last summer in Santa Fe - and the women in my cohort are now people I think of as my community and friends. It really reminded me of the power of community - something I had lost. Your post today resonates with me.
Thanks Lana. I found the MEA Santa Fe experience pretty spectacular, and the physical setting helped too. I'm glad you had a similar experience and appreciate your sharing it here.
I tried an eco jujitsu class last week where they teach by playing timed games(one person tries to do X and the other defends) super fast paced and fun. After getting thrown around for an hour the instructor asked everyone to grab a seat and their water. Then we went around the room and spoke about what we were grateful for. One person said ice cream with friends, another about his wife’s quiet and enjoyable birthday. When it got to me I said Inwas grateful they welcomed me in and were relatively gentle. Then I shocked myself by talking about how grateful I am our son who has struggled all through high school applied late to a college he liked, got accepted and brought into their lacrosse team. I am a deeply reserved person. Clearly I felt comfortable enough to share. It felt really good. They also run a crossfit style class which I am trying in two weeks. I’m going to pick after that which one I do. But I want to be a part of that community.
I feel what you went through ... or rather, I did last week. I'm not particularly emotional around most people, particularly strangers, and when it came time for me to read aloud my promises, I was the first one that choked up. That then set off the tsunami! I love that you were in this hard class ... and then that you did something even harder by opening up. You impress me by continuing to get it done on so many fronts.
Aw thank you. I also cry watching movies when I’m alone sometimes… I spent so long being afraid to try new things that I feel like I’m making up for lost time.
Ah yes, community. I also am an only child. My father was career military. I counted eleven different secondary schools before I graduated from high school. I’m quite comfortable being alone in the company of books and long hikes. I wonder if any research has been conducted on people who enjoy being alone? I know people who can’t stand being alone. In many respects, I think that’s an unhealthy behavior. I’m not saying I don’t enjoy being with people, but I enjoy my own company too. While I appreciate what the research says, I continue to think, “it depends “
I like being alone a lot ... and I mean, A LOT. However, I've increasingly found that shrinking that bubble just a bit to more connect with others has led me to learn and test myself in new ways. And dare I even admit it ... it feels kind of good.
I couldn’t agree with you more! Community becomes more and more important as we age. That and exercise, the key to health and longevity. Especially as we leave our work routines. Much of my socialization revolved around that. Now as I shift into this new phase I find it revolving around shared interests. I’m developing my new tribe as I lean into interests that I have true passion for.
That's so key ... "I'm developing my new tribe as I lean into interests that I have true passion for." These tribes are chosen and not necessarily ones we land in by circumstance. Thanks for the note.
I find it interesting that both of you, Lana, and Gwendolyn, had this epiphany while far from home. Is it because there was a dearth of people you could connect with where you live, or was it because you’re in a new environment and somewhat force/ encouraged to interact with people that you might not normally meet? I suspect the latter.
It could be some of both, though more the latter. I think when you come into a focused environment around a topic or common interest, you become close more quickly because you are in a shared headspace. I found that to be the case at the Don't Die, MEA and this recent CCL Leadership at the Peak gatherings.
I am also an only child who is content to be alone. But I attended a MEA retreat on women's health last summer in Santa Fe - and the women in my cohort are now people I think of as my community and friends. It really reminded me of the power of community - something I had lost. Your post today resonates with me.
Thanks Lana. I found the MEA Santa Fe experience pretty spectacular, and the physical setting helped too. I'm glad you had a similar experience and appreciate your sharing it here.
I tried an eco jujitsu class last week where they teach by playing timed games(one person tries to do X and the other defends) super fast paced and fun. After getting thrown around for an hour the instructor asked everyone to grab a seat and their water. Then we went around the room and spoke about what we were grateful for. One person said ice cream with friends, another about his wife’s quiet and enjoyable birthday. When it got to me I said Inwas grateful they welcomed me in and were relatively gentle. Then I shocked myself by talking about how grateful I am our son who has struggled all through high school applied late to a college he liked, got accepted and brought into their lacrosse team. I am a deeply reserved person. Clearly I felt comfortable enough to share. It felt really good. They also run a crossfit style class which I am trying in two weeks. I’m going to pick after that which one I do. But I want to be a part of that community.
I feel what you went through ... or rather, I did last week. I'm not particularly emotional around most people, particularly strangers, and when it came time for me to read aloud my promises, I was the first one that choked up. That then set off the tsunami! I love that you were in this hard class ... and then that you did something even harder by opening up. You impress me by continuing to get it done on so many fronts.
Aw thank you. I also cry watching movies when I’m alone sometimes… I spent so long being afraid to try new things that I feel like I’m making up for lost time.
Ah yes, community. I also am an only child. My father was career military. I counted eleven different secondary schools before I graduated from high school. I’m quite comfortable being alone in the company of books and long hikes. I wonder if any research has been conducted on people who enjoy being alone? I know people who can’t stand being alone. In many respects, I think that’s an unhealthy behavior. I’m not saying I don’t enjoy being with people, but I enjoy my own company too. While I appreciate what the research says, I continue to think, “it depends “
I like being alone a lot ... and I mean, A LOT. However, I've increasingly found that shrinking that bubble just a bit to more connect with others has led me to learn and test myself in new ways. And dare I even admit it ... it feels kind of good.
I relish being alone. I read, knit, write, think, create. I describe myself as an extroverted introvert.
My younger daughter is a true introvert, very comfortable being alone. People suck her energy, she can do it, but then needs to retreat and recharge.
I couldn’t agree with you more! Community becomes more and more important as we age. That and exercise, the key to health and longevity. Especially as we leave our work routines. Much of my socialization revolved around that. Now as I shift into this new phase I find it revolving around shared interests. I’m developing my new tribe as I lean into interests that I have true passion for.
That's so key ... "I'm developing my new tribe as I lean into interests that I have true passion for." These tribes are chosen and not necessarily ones we land in by circumstance. Thanks for the note.